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Not the Rensselaer Tour/E/
FOOTER
/J/Why we are doing this.../QE/
GO
/m/Introduction/m/
/p/Not the RPI Tour is an outgrowth of /u/Not the Rensselaer
Handbook/u/, which is a guide to, logically enough, the "real"
RPI, as opposed to the fictitious (or at least apocryphal)
"Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute" which looked like such a nice
place until you got here.  The standard Admissions Office
tour being such an integral part of the perpetuation of this myth,
it seemed appropriate that any group attempting to present 
another view disseminate its opinions through its own version of
the campus tour.  Or at least think about the possibility.
/p/The philosophy behind Not the RPI Tour is much the same as that
behind /u/Not the Handbook/u/, i.e. to present those parts of the
truth of this place which are not presented by official sources.
In this case that means a more realistic, humourous, sarcastic, and
even downright cynical "rap" than the ones provided to the official
tour guides.
/j3/
/m/Arranging the Tour/m/
/p/As of the current date nothing has been arranged as far as 
thoughts of actually performing the tour.  This will be a very 
difficult thing to deal with as the Administration will be very 
unhappy with anyone scaring away prospective freshmen.  Perhaps 
giving the tour to alumni and students is a reasonable 
alternative.
/j3/
/m/Starting the Tour/m/
/p/Where to start the tour is an important question.  The most 
obvious place, being the most collegiate-looking, is of course 
that picturesque place just up the hill from the Union.  But that 
has been done, so maybe we should try somewhere else.  Practical 
considerations for collecting a group would predicate such a 
location as the Union or the Visitor's Information Center (a.k.a. 
Security), but by that logic those would be good places to hold 
classes, so maybe we should start at West Hall.
/j3/
/m/West Hall/m/ (can be inserted wherever, even if we decide not
to start with West Hall)
/p/West Hall is a typically ugly RPI building.  It has been around
for as long as you would think from looking at it, and as you might
notice if you were in front of it, it has not been a classroom 
building for all that time.  Yes, indeed, it did spend many years
as Troy Hospital.
/p/It was recently pressed into a renewed surge
of class-type use when the Sage laboratories, visible up the hill
(more on them later), were taken out of use for a year ('82-'83,
in fact) for renovations.  The Institute then made a mistake by
letting in "too many" freshmen the following year and West Hall was 
still necessary for class space.  So it continues to be the
bane of the RPI student's existence, particularly since one's
earliest class tends to be here, unless of course you live downtown,
which of course would make things too easy.
/p/Another interesting story about West Hall is that it is not 
holding itself in place very well.  While this very widely believed
tale is in fact apocryphal, there nevertheless is a tenacious will
to believe it. The reason West Hall isn't slipping faster is
supposedly a number of chains connecting it to the foundation of the
Sage Labs. This story also may be apocryphal, but it, again, is
fairly widely held.
/j3/
/m/The Pittsburgh Building/m/
/p/The Pittsburgh Building is the location of most of the
Institute's Administration offices.  This is obvious (would be
obvious in winter) from the fact that it is the only building which
is quickly, efficiently, and dependably plowed out of a snowstorm.
It is convenient from West Hall, as you can see, but the tough walk
up the stairs to the rest of campus minimizes unnecessary business.
Once you are there, the Registrar's office is quite convenient, and
the Bursar's is in the Basement.
/j3/
/m/Walker Lab/m/
/p/Walker is the home of the Chemistry department.  While not the
most modern facility, this is unimportant since even mildly 
sophisticated Chem work is done in other buildings.  Walker is
plenty well equipped for Freshman labs and similar uses. 
/p/There are a few general classrooms in Walker, which can be
nice places to have a class despite the huge climb up the stairs.
This is because the view is phenomenal, for Troy.  In the fall
(also known as "foliage season"), this alone is a good reason to
have a class there.  The disadvantage to these classrooms,
especially those on the top floor (having the best views) is that 
in any rain or hailstorm the copper roof makes so much noise that
the professor cannot be heard.  Then again maybe this is an
advantage.
/j3/
/m/Sage Labs/m/
/p/If you remember, I promised a while back that I'd tell you more
about the Sage labs building "later."  Well, it's later.
Now you're in for it.
/p/Sage has been called by an expert source the "post-modern
architectural wonder of the campus."  This is most likely a biased
comment, you might say, but actually it's not.  Just sarcastic.
Sage was recently redesigned (by an RPI alumnus, no less) with
very questioned decor.  One of the truly amazing details is a
"house" filling a rather large open space on the top floor, complete
with windows, shutters, house door, roof, and more.  Rather cute
in a different way is the fact that on the main floor one must
pass through a lecture hall to get to another wing. 
/p/The main floor is an interesting thing in itself, being that
it's actually the third floor.  It shares this feature with the 
Jonsson Engineering Center.  In both buildings one generally enters
on the third floor.